Mon. Oct 26th, 2020
Brexit Coin

Sajid Javid launched a Brexit Day 50 pence piece, bearing the legend, ‘Peace, Prosperity and Friendship with All Nations’. However, Remoaners are refusing to accept the new Brexit 50p piece.

We are not amused

As a public service, here at Chatty Towers we are prepared to collect your unwanted 50 pence pieces.

Simply gather your unwanted coins and send them directly to us and we will arrange for their disposal.

If it’s easier, take the coins into your local bank and convert them to banknotes. You can then send us the banknotes and we will symbolically dispose of your unwelcome Brexit money. Given that banknotes are lighter think of the saving in postage!

Chatty has confirmed that any monies sent to us will not be passed on to local charities, nor will the coins themselves be destroyed, instead the money will be spent on beer, cheese and peanuts. This will provide a welcome boost to the local economy.

We promise to spend it on beer, cheese and peanuts

In a side note, we have also discovered that remoaners are buying copies of the Daily Mail’s Brexit Day commemorative issue and using it to; line cat litter trays, clean up dog poo and dry their tears.

lined with the Daily Mail

We would like to point out two things:

  1. Under no circumstances should you send copies of the Daily Mail to us.
  2. Never, regardless of the reason or occasion, buy a copy of The Daily Mail.

Remember, The Chatty Chimp is here to serve you, so send us your banknotes!

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By Bernard

Bernard has been with us since the beginning. Bright, funny and blessed with a sharp satirical edge are things he wish had been said about him.

The Chatty Chimp, where we don't do fake news, all our stories are 100% made up!