Just when you think that government can’t get any worse, they manage to prove you wrong. What a shower.
I’m a Tory Get Me Out of Here!
Everyone thinks Minister is a soulless machine as he fails The Turing Test
Audience identifies minsters responses as a machine. Turing left baffled.
BBC News in meltdown as young Prince makes tinkle without Nanny
Meanwhile the mop used to clean the toilet is for sale on EBAY, where a Mr N Witch is winning with a bid of £2,000.
Sir Moore Patrick claims that Astronomy isn’t funny anymore
Astronomy is really boring, I thought there would be aliens and lasers and stuff but it is all just rocks.
Meghan and Harry announce they are expecting second slice of cake
Meghan and Harry announce that they are going to live a more private life in the full glare of world wide publicity.
Government launches the COVID Regulations Game Show
COVID Regulations game show where the winners can win an online delivery slot at their supermarket of choice.
Automaton wins the BBC’s annual (Sports) Lack of Personality Award
The annual lack of personality award goes to a colossal dullard.
Babs bars Jesus from The Pearly Gates pub
I’m not having it, you can’t go around asking women if they are virgins, not in my pub
‘Baby, It’s Cold Outside’ slammed for encouraging lockdown breaches
“This song is incredibly insensitive, with its insidious subtext and elitist culture” says woke singleton, Paul
Anti Bullshit vaccine is 98.5% effective
The impact on social media micro-advertising is expected to be dramatic.
Does Rupert Bear sh*t in the woods? …erm…Yes, he does
You can take the bear out of the woods, but when it comes to taking the wood out of the bear, there is only one place to do it.
Masterchef cancelled as Britain runs out of ruddy ducks!
Spatch left the competition after his duck failed to impress the judges. The duck wasn’t too keen on him either.
The Chatty Chimp 