“Do you have room for a single mother of three? You do, how lovely” says Prince
Hunt announces benefit increase for soon-to-be unemployable MPs
As a record number of Tory MPs lose their five jobs, Hunt brings in TWAT Relief to help out.
Conference Tories to win back voters with a bribe fuelled culture war, again
By legalising the killing of grandparents young people will finally be able to get on to the housing ladder.
South East Water surprised by the sudden arrival of summer
By extending Wimbledon to 6 weeks, holding Glastonbury fortnightly and making every Monday a bank holiday we should get enough water for the summer.
Hunt hails ‘historic’ budget as he unveils free doggy day care for all
Free doggy day care and some other rubbish about pension benefits for the rich and the workhouse for the sick, disabled and over-fifties.
5-yr-old brought in to explain Liz Truss’s energy cap to Liz Truss
Liz, it was your policy, you announced it, the least you can do is understand it!
The Pound achieves parity with The Peanut
As The Pound continues to plummet, the price of peanuts has been rising steadily. Nuts are seen as the safer option for investors.
‘Greed got me where I am today’ said Fat Boy Johnson
“There’s no such thing as a free lunch, I make them pay me to eat it!” says The Blonde Balloon
The Shite strikes Free Trade Agreement with Mordor
The Shite strikes a Free Trade Agreement with Mordor because it is a long way off and hard to get to
“Let’s help those that are helping themselves,” says Think Tank
There is a risk that the highest tax burden will fall on those working hardest to avoid paying any!
Mike Cashley to use the Legions of the Damned to keep his shops open
All Mr S Atan wanted in return was my eternal soul, and as it doesn’t exist I was happy to sign it over.
Government opens up HS3, a chuffing service from Caernarfon to Rhyl
The Welsh Musket Train flying from Caernarfon to Rhyl in a day and a half.