An able-bodied driver parked in a disabled parking bay today. Jefferson Richmond from Harlow, Essex, noticed the empty parking bay, whilst en route to his weekly food shop.

Mr Richmond, a conspiracy theory enthusiast, explained, “I got clamped and fined last December for doing the same, and the mitigating circumstances, that I was being targeted due to the UKIP sticker on my vehicle plus my left knee was slightly sore, were ignored on appeal”

He continued, “It was then that I realised that there wouldn’t be any wardens in this area, and there were no disabled people out. Keeping the handicapped at home part of the Government’s conspiracy to install the Matrix. Anyway, as a free thinker and truth seer, I thought, why not get my own back? So I parked in the disabled bay.” 

With a smug look on his face and sense of victory Mr Richmond then proceeded to walk the 1.5 miles to the supermarket.