Fri. Oct 30th, 2020
Catch that migrant, catch him now

More Migrants have been caught in the middle of the English Channel and have been returned to Birmingham

Today a joint operation between the Police and the Border Force captured three boats full of migrants desperate to flee the UK. The families were taken back to shore, where they were placed in police custody. They are expected to be returned to their homes, in Birmingham sometime tomorrow.

A Home Office spokesman said, “I’m pleased to say this joint operation was a complete success. We can’t have people just upping and leaving, not now we are at the start of the fruit picking season. Hopefully, today’s publicity will act as a deterrent to other low paid Doctors, Pharmacists, Engineers and Surgeons that are here working as Cleaners, Car Washers and Fruit Pickers, that we value their contribution to our culture.”

Ianni Naptonescu, from Romania explained “We just couldn’t take living in Birmingham any longer. It’s become a terrible place to live. Everywhere you look there is poverty, crime, religious intolerance, racism and Wetherspoons. I felt we should return to Romania, where I could resume work as a paediatrician.  Over there my family would have the chance of a better life, but no! you couldn’t even let me have that.”

So far, the Border Agency believe they’ve been successful in stopping over 1,000 economic migrants from leaving the country. However, they do warn that as Brexit continues the number seeking to sneak out of the country is expected to increase and they need more money to deal with the problem.

Meanwhile Brexit continues.

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By Joe The Greek

Joe The Greek is a man of many words and considerable girth. Never shy when it comes to the bar and buffet table.

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