The only man to tell even a shred of truth in the modern political world has resigned.

Sir Kim Darroch, formerly the UK’s Ambassador in Washington, had reported back to the Foreign Office that the Trump White House might never be seen as competent, confirming the views of about seven billion casual observers, but due to this confidential report being leaked, he was forced to resign. 

“Being called a very stupid guy by Trump of all people really took the biscuit,” Darroch’s spokesman said. 

Darroch was, in any case, due to retire later this year. It’s thought that he will spend the extra few months off preparing his memoirs and that a fierce bidding war will take place for the book, in which the full truth about the White House will be revealed. “He’s thinking of calling it Real News,” his spokesman said.

No longer wishing to stay in the United States, Darroch hesitated about returning to the UK, which he sees as a far bigger mess than the States. “If it’s a toss up between living in America with Trump, or Britain with Boris, the South of France starts to look really appealing,” the spokesman added.
Riviera estate agents will be very pleased to help should this also be Real News.