Reports are emerging that The Duke Of Edinburgh’s recent car crash may not have been an accident, and may not even have been the Old Man’s fault.
An investigation into the Land Rover’s service history has found that the vehicle received attention to its brakes only the day before at Spencer’s of Northamptonshire and that the technician assigned to the work was GOD.
A spokesman for Spencer’s, Ian Napton, said, “GOD works on all of our most important clients’ cars. She insists on it.”
Undercover investigation has found GOD to be Ghost Of Diana. “She’s a dab hand with the important stuff like suspension and brakes, but people always call after collecting their cars to say they’ve unexpectedly found a George Michael CD in the CD player.”
Suspicion is arising that GOD engineered The Duke’s misfortune. “Ever since she died, she’s complained bitterly about “them” arranging the crash in Paris. She should probably let it go by now.” added Mr Napton.
The Palace has refused to comment.