Tommy RobinsonMonkey Business

Tommy Robinson to update his Trip Advisor entry for Pentonville Hotel

Top Trip Advisor reviewer, Tommy Robinson, returns to The Pentonville Hotel to see if it’s taken his previous comments on board.

Last time Tommy stayed at The Pentonville he only gave it a one-star rating. He was very critical of the facilities, food and atmosphere. He also felt that the room service was far below the standard expected from such a busy hotel.

The Pen’s Governor, Ian Napton, says they’ve taken notice of Tommy’s comments and have worked hard to make major improvements.

Top of the list were the en-suite bathroom arrangements, which Tommy described as ‘Very Third World’. So, all rooms have been upgraded with a new bucket.  

An interior designer has introduced a fashionable Grey Theme, to the internal décor. Although they havn’t yet replaced the thin rubber mattresses and worn sheets nor have they improved the taste of the pillows.  

Staff have been retrained and issued with new, more comfortable batons, handcuffs, tasers and strait jackets. The Pen is hoping that these improvements will lead to an improved customer experience.

The Restaurant manager, of whom Tommy was particularly critical, explained that “We try to cater for fussy eaters, such as vegans, vegetarians, pescatarians, those with various dietary intolerances and religious preferences but we’ve so many customers its hard to cater for everyone. Therefore we’ve streamlined the menu, resorting to a traditional British diet of Porridge. it’s based on an old Jamie Oliver recipe. If they’re hungry enough, they’ll eat it.”

The Pen has left the gym and showers unchanged, as Tommy explained they were the highlight of his last visit.

Mr Napton said “We have put a lot of work in since Mr Robinson was last here and our staff are looking forward to welcoming him back. Hopefully he will see the improvements we’ve made and upgrade our Trip Advisor rating accordingly.”

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