Ian Napton hadn’t seen his mate Andy for a while, so they agreed to meet for ‘a quick one’ after work. Both assured family, friends and work colleagues that they’d just meet up for an hour, have a couple of pints befroe heading home to enjoy a busy weekend with their families.

Gillian Napton takes up the story “They turned up at four in the morning, completely legless. Ian was hungry so he tried to make cheese on toast, he ruined the grill, trashed the kitchen and set off the fire alarm. The prats then fell asleep watching Bullseye re-runs. If he says, ‘Here’s what you would have won!’ one more time I’ll swing for him. A quick one my arse! they’ve spoiled the whole family’s weekend.”

The two idiots had gotten back to Ian’s in the early hours of the morning, after he had assured Andy that “Gillian won’t mind! She’d love to see you again!” and “Yes, she’s always wanted a cat, it will make a lovely gift!”. This was far from the case.

Gillian made a very hungover Ian clean up the kitchen, return the cat, and book a spa break for her and her bestie by way of apology. Meanwhile Andy is ‘enjoying’ a long period of silence, whilst he waits for his wife to calm down.

Both the boys vowed never to go for ‘a quick one’ again.