Sir BenMonkey Business

The Sun defend being a right bunch of Jeremy’s

A spokesperson for the Sun defended their decision to publish a brutally insensitive article, relating to England cricket star Ben Stokes, on the basis that it was ‘in the national interest.’

Continuing the diatribe, they announced, ‘We are all a little bit sick of Brexit, so in the absence of a good child abduction story, or the Queen snuffing it, we thought we’d give the public a hearty tragedy to get stuck into it.’

Defending the article, a Sun ‘journalist’, who enjoys plucking legs off of insects in his spare time, spewed ‘Don’t deny it, the public love a bit of the ‘McGann’ factor, plus I really want a new Range Rover, so I can knock down more family pets and even the occasional granny.’

Unrepentant, he went on, ‘In all honesty, an all-expenses-paid trip to New Zealand, was more appealing than rooting around in dustbins, tapping into phones or hanging about in celebrity’s toilets.’

While most of Britain unreservedly condemned the article, a Trump representative commented, ‘This journo is the greatest of great guys. This isn’t fake news. Perhaps he can come work for us?’