Hippie ChildMonkey Life

Highgate Head claims being a ‘Shakra and Vibration Guru’ doesn’t qualify you as a key worker

A Highgate school has ‘vehemently rejected’, an angry parent’s plea, to allow her child to continue schooling as normal.

Back to school
Back to school you little git

Self-proclaimed ‘shakra and vibration guru’, Olivia Napton, claims that as ‘an energy shaman’, she should be considered a ‘key-worker’, therefore allowing her daughter Brabantia-Dragonflower, uninterrupted education.

Speaking passionately, Napton argued, ‘At a time of national crisis, it’s imperative that I am free to heal the afflicted. I plan to clang my gong and perform a healing dance, outside every major London hospital.’

Ommmm, that will be a £150, please.

Responding rapidly, the Highgate head, who wishes to remain anonymous, riposted, ’While we appreciate Ms Napton’s dedication, leaving Brabantia at the gates and running off, wasn’t entirely appropriate.’

Continuing wryly he went on, ‘It’s regrettable that Brabantia’s ‘’lively disposition’’, adversely affects Ms Napton’s energy field but a perhaps daily P.E session with Joe Wicks, will be a mutually affirming spiritual activity.’



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s