Seagulls in the UK have applied for humanitarian aid.
The Great Squawker of the Seagull Council has pleaded for supplies in a communique to the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds.
A spokesperson for the RSPB explained ….. “The current seagull population are many generations away from their ancestors who knew how to fish and forage from the ocean or shoreline meaning those skills have been lost, and therefore the prospect of millions starving to death is very real.
The Great Squawker wrote ….’Please help us! Our flocks are going hungry. We are desperate for food, anything will do. All we see are humans looking out from their nests with very few going outside. And those outside are not eating and throwing half of it away for us to scavenge. All the food overflowing from bins recently has gone and there is no more lying around – nor bags of chips to dive-bomb.
Uxbridge chooses Boris Johnson as their Village Idiot
Boris is such an idiot that he struggles to find Uxbridge on a map, let alone visit the place.
Hunt hails ‘historic’ budget as he unveils free doggy day care for all
Free doggy day care and some other rubbish about pension benefits for the rich and the workhouse for the sick, disabled and over-fifties.
Waitrose opens a Tory Refugee Centre in Guilford
Right-whingers have become an oppressed minority and they need somewhere safe to be racist, sexist homophobic royalists.
Categories:Monkey Life, Monkey News
The Chatty Chimp 