Growing pressure for an inquiry into their handling of the Covid-19 pandemic has been rejected by the UK government. A spokesperson from No. 10 stated there was no point because they had been brilliant so far.
They added “We have been absolutely marvellous and also, because of the estimated £123bn billion spent by the end of October, there won’t be enough money left in the Treasury to buy that amount of whitewash”.
Sources close to the Prime Minister have revealed that if he is forced to set one up, the first port of call to head it will be Sir John Chilcot who led the inquiry into the 2003 Iraq War.
It’s alleged Chilcot would be the favourite because after starting the Iraq War inquiry in 2009, seven years later concluded Tony Blair, the Prime Minister a the time, had been a bit of a scamp and therefore should not be given a knighthood, nor a seat in the House of Lords.
Farage Riots – Season Two ‘Not as good as the original,’ says TV Critic
This summer brought season two of the hit series The Farage Riots to our screens. The new series aired relentlessly on all the major news channels. As the nation continued to scroll through online shopping apps on their phones, reporters came in their pants with excitement as cheap tracksuit-wearing football fans set about burning down…
Nigel Farage Misses Gold at Hide-and-Seek Championship
He may be slipperier than an eel in an oil tanker but even Nigel Mirage can catch Donald Trump!
“Poor people must work harder!” says Farage
“Work harder” says Frottage. “Don’t you mean work smarter?”. “No, I ahd it right the first time.”
Categories:Monkey Life, Monkey News, Politics
The Chatty Chimp 