Spurs fans stocking up after it’s announced that cocaine use would lead to football banning order.
Boris Johnson to lose passport after admitting cocaine use
European BDSM Research Group aren’t getting their punishment
Research Group members left weeping with disappointment after the harsh punishment they were promised was withdrawn.
Nest of Vipers offended at being compared to Boris Johnson’s back office
Vipers are offended at the very idea of being compared to the slithery, sleazy, creepy bastards that fill Johnson’s back office.
Scottish Government’s job search App says “Yer Da Sells Avon!”
Selling Avon is opening so many doors! Have you seen our new concealer? I use it myself.
Smell something different with Westminster Scented Candles
The Commons candle smells of freshly laundered money, Russian Vodka and Dry Rot, with high-notes of Bullshit
Johnson to defeat storms by fitting the UK with double glazing
“It’s another BoJo special, millions spent and nothing ever built.” says Heath Robinson, Builder.
The Chatty Chimp 