Golf, golf, golf, that is all he thinks about! I’m sure he prefers his golfing buddies to me!
Anger simmers in the suburbs
Priti Patel to fight for UFC title under the name Paticake
“I can take those bitches down. I eat pussies like you for breakfast” says Paticake
Corona Virus upgraded to ‘kin serious now that a football match has been moved
Britain refuses to take Corona Virus seriously until football matches are moved.
Spurs to play all their games behind closed doors
Officials at the club took the decision came following their game against RB Leipzig, which ended in a humiliating 0-3 defeat, and exit from The Champions League. The club said that following […]
Britain is to be turned into a waterpark!
Boris Island Waterpark will offer slides, lazy rivers and an array of watersports.
Everton announce ‘Stone Cold’ Steve as their new manager
Everton appoint ex-Professional Wrestler, Stone Cold Steve Austin, as their new manager. The board hope it will bring a bit of fight to the team
FA releases an album of the football fans greatest chants
The FA release an album of football fans greatest chants. Spread Xmas love with “Dirty Northern Bastards” and “It’s nice to know your here, now fuck off!”
VAR Review Overturns Result in Battle of Stalingrad
VAR Review overturns the Battle of Stalingrad. Several Russian players were clearly in an offside position when tey attacked.
Leaders Debate poll results show all four lost
Polls following the latest Leaders Debate show that all four candidates lost. In a verdict that spells disaster for the UK, they were all equally useless.
Footballer forced to leave the pitch after a serious injury to his hair-do
Mario Brothers was forced to leave the field after he sustained a serious injury to his hair-do. Despite her best efforts, Sharon couldn’t fix the damage.
WHL pitch will be ready for Jose’s goal-mouth bus
Spurs have prepared the ground as per Jose Mourinho’s instructions. The ashpalt and bus parking lines will be dry in time for the first game.
Derby County – A Moral Example to Us All
Derby County have selflessly sacrificed Richard Keogh, Unfair to suggest that at 33 he’d cock all to offer so its not much of a loss, very unfair indeed
The Chatty Chimp 