“I provide a valuable social service” says burglar.”I shouldn’t lose out just because I can’t work from your home!”
Burglar given benefits after everyone starts working from home
Corona Virus upgraded to ‘kin serious now that a football match has been moved
Britain refuses to take Corona Virus seriously until football matches are moved.
Spurs to play all their games behind closed doors
Officials at the club took the decision came following their game against RB Leipzig, which ended in a humiliating 0-3 defeat, and exit from The Champions League. The club said that following […]
As the toilet paper shortage begins to bite, Greta Thunberg urges people to recycle
“Please recycle your used bog roll, save the planet and don’t destroy my future” says Greta
Toilet Roll shortage leads to surge in demand for Piers Morgan’s Biography
Not as good as the real thing says one user, my finger ripped through!
Markets rally as Donald leads an anti-Corona Virus prayer meeting
Of course more poor people will die, that is because the American God doesn’t like poor people.
Corona Virus outbreak means we can all stop hugging each other
Millions of Brits are secretly relieved that the outbreak of the Corona Virus means they can stop hugging people they barely know. For the last twenty years the British people have been […]
Gloop launches new Vampire Repellent spray
Have you seen a vampire? No, well that’s proof that it works!
Scientists baffled why 1st Monday in Feb is National Sickie Day
Why is the first Monday after payday and dry January the sickest day of the year? Scientists are baffled.
Brexitvirus outbreak hits the UK
Brexitvirus hits UK, current outbreak is expected to last 25 years. A whole generation have lost their voice.
Having read a book on anatomy Old Guy retires from satire to be a Doctor
Having read a book on Anatomy, Old Guy retires from satire to take up Medicine. If Jared can do it, so can I says OG.
Middle-aged man goes to ‘find himself’ and discovers he’s some kind of ‘c**t’
A middle-aged man set off on a journey to find himself, he discovered he was some kind of c**t and he is quite happy with that!
The Chatty Chimp 