Chatty’s back and he’s bloody annoyed with England’s plastic patriots. You’ve woken him from his afternoon nap.
Rumours of The Chatty Chimp’s demise were a little previous
Everyone thinks Minister is a soulless machine as he fails The Turing Test
Audience identifies minsters responses as a machine. Turing left baffled.
Priti Patel claims she is innocent after massive pay-off to bullying victim
We would like to make it clear that there is no suggestion that an enormous cash pay off in anyway suggests that Priti Patel is guilty, absolutely not.
Thames Water to use politicians bullshit to power homes
There are plans to extend the renewable energy scheme to Town Halls, Churches and Piers Morgan’s studio.
Boris Johnson announces new ‘Clap for Clap for carers’
Look, I need a gimmick to distract people, otherwise they will realise that this shit show is all my fault
The Shite strikes Free Trade Agreement with Mordor
The Shite strikes a Free Trade Agreement with Mordor because it is a long way off and hard to get to
British Fish are as happy as a horse in a lasagne
British Fish are jolly happy to be back in British Waters says over-entitled cockwomble
Hitler explains that he never meant for his followers to organise a putsch
My Proud Boys got a bit carried away, that’s all. I didn’t mean anything by it, it’s not my fault.
Will Williamson Win the Chris Grayling Achievement Award?
With help and support it is possible that Gavin Williamson will be able to surpass the achievements of Chris Grayling.
Ex-President Trump says “Pardon me while I Pardonnez-Moi”
Ex-President Trump says well, pardonnez-mois
I like Frucking and I like to Fruck, If you don’t like Frucking, tough luck*
“Look, Boris, put your frucks away, I won’t tell you again!” says Nanny, in a forceful tone
European BDSM Research Group aren’t getting their punishment
Research Group members left weeping with disappointment after the harsh punishment they were promised was withdrawn.
The Chatty Chimp 