“When it comes to lying in front of the TV all day, doing cock all, I am your man,” says Grandad
Grandad, what did you do in the Corona War?
Staycation? You’ve got to be kidding
As the public once again ignore requests to help Britain by holidaying at home in favour of sun, sangria and sex!
Accidental community hero honoured by his neighbours
I’ll be ready once I’ve remodelled the kitchen and added a conservatory
Deaf signer accused of misinterpreting what Boris said
Signer brings the country together when he accidentally calls Boris a wanker
Fit Driver gets revenge on Traffic Warden by parking in a disabled bay
“He got me months ago, but there was no one about today so I parked there again, I walked 1.5 miles to the shop but I showed him”
Commemoration of the death of our Savior, Donald J Trump
The World gathers to give thanks to its savior, Donald J Trump, sadly misunderstood in his own time now revered by the survivors
Anger simmers in the suburbs
Golf, golf, golf, that is all he thinks about! I’m sure he prefers his golfing buddies to me!
Mark Francois to stand in for Boris Johnson
A good soldier is always ready, I’ve got my potato-peeler
National plea for relief from Tedious Uplifting Songs
For God’s sake spare us from this uplifting shite!
Wannabe super villain misunderstands ‘Clap For Our NHS’
Evil plan to give the NHS a bloody good dose of the clap, thwarted!
After 2 days in lockdown, a couple married for 30 years are to divorce
How does her brain keep going, filled with all that rubbish, it just flows out of her, 24/7
Positive test for Charlie
After working from homes, Charlie, The Prince of Wales, has isolated himself in Scotland
The Chatty Chimp 