Millennial Hipster, Skye Nation was left traumatised after buying coffee from a coffee chain.
Hipster traumatised after buying coffee from a chain
thecrownprince
The Scooby-Doo Gang clear the Creepy Old Amusement Park Owner
Scooby and The Gang cleared the Creepy Old Guy, even though he had done the thing!
Prince Harry granted asylum in Canada as he flees his angry Gran
Fleeing persecution from his angry Gran, Prince Harry has been granted political asylum in Canada.
Hunchback of Notre Dame to make Big Ben bong on Brexit Day
Hunchback of Notre Dame to make Big Ben bong. Mark Francois ‘If you wanted an ugly, repulsive, hunch-back to ring the bell, surely it should have been me?’
Jacob Rees-Mogg wins BAFTA for his role in Dracula
Jacob Rees-Mogg wins a Best Actor BAFTA for Dracula. He was so believable as the callous, rapacious blood sucker, it was as though he were a Vampire.
The Pointless Awards Ceremony – Valuing the valueless
Rewarding the mediocre, crediting the credulous and valuing the valueless. This year’s most meaningless award goes to It’s All Bollocks Ltd for something.
TSB to improve customer service by closing their branches
TSB are so fed up with appalling customer service ratings that they have decided to improve things by closing their branches.
Mr Braine resigns UKIP leadership despite having done nothing wrong
Dick Braine resigned the UKIP Leadership despite having done nothing wrong. After 3 months in the role, he has decided he’s not cut out for politics.
Jeremy Corbyn promises free kittens and puppies for everyone
Jeremy Corbyn promises every house a new puppy or kitten if Labour win the next election, the plan will be paid through increased tax on Dog Jacket makers.
Boris to set his Dad on Jeremy unless he stops being a meanie
Boris to send his Dad round to Jeremy’s as tension escalates over a General Election. Possible that this year’s nativity may be cancelled.
Homeless Southend man forced to eat in Starbucks
A homeless Southend man was made to eat in Starbucks after a well-wisher forced food upon him. Staff tried to throw the vagrant out but failed.
Doctor confirms patient doesn’t have dementia, he’s just thick
A Doctor has told a relieved family that Dad doesn’t have dementia, it’s just that he’s thick. The technical term is ‘Thickius Asmincius’.
The Chatty Chimp 