How do I know which way the flag’s supposed to go? I’m from Rochdale!
Union Jack painted upside-down on BJ’s new plane
Man Turns Into Chlorinated Superhero
I can clean anything, I’m Super Chlorinated Chicken Man
Eton, Oxford and The Royal Family outlawed as White Supremacist Groups
Elite organisations that hold the power, the money and all the influence. What could be wrong with that?
Political transfer market is open for business
No other country has come in with a bid for Boris, even America would rather stick with Donald
Where’s Wally sponsor Boris’s world-beating Track and Trace Programme
The 3 book training programme; Wally goes to Barnard Castle, Wally goes to Specsavers and Wally’s in the Rose Garden.
BBC replace Newsnight host because she is too intelligent
We can’t have a woman blowing apart the Government’s bullshit, through thoughtful and responsible journalism!
Government ruse extends Cummings garden by 250 miles
It’s not his fault his begonias are 250 miles away! he is allowed to tend his own garden.
The Government have handled Covid-19 brilliantly, says Boris
We did everything we could, when we should have done it, even though we didn’t know what we were doing!
Bojocchio becomes locked in Downing Street
As Bojocchio’s nose kept growing, every time he spoke, the emergency carpenter’s services are to be retained on a permanent basis.
The Great Lockdown Escape Plan, featuring every Tom, Dick and Harry
Dig your way to victory.
Lawyers acting for the baby demand paternity test
Spokesmen for Eton, Oxford U and Ford Open Prison have confirmed that the baby is on the waiting list.
Cupid issues a public apology to Carrie Symonds
“I’ll get myself down to Specsavers, should have gone there in the first place” says Cupid
The Chatty Chimp 