The Mountie’s always get their man, so we are going to use that expertise to track down the contacts and bring them in.
Government to boost national mood with Meh! Britannia, Spitfire production and Jingoism
Spitfire production will restart in Swindon, when the Honda factory closes down. Britannia will rule again.
Lockdown reintroduced to prevent the return of doorstep clapping
Unless we abide by social distancing rules, we will all be back on the bloody doorstep, clapping
Education Department sack the tea lady as exam row rumbles on
The Tea Lady was unavailable, having just bought a 4 bed house in the Cotswolds, a new car and a French holiday home.
What A Carry On! starring Sid Johnson, Kenneth Williamson and Hatti Patel
The plot is ruddy hilarious, you’d think it could never happen in real life, but it has
Foreign agents must register for a ‘Right to Spy’ permit
The one thing Russia doesn’t need to bother spying on is Britain. No! they bought that years ago.
‘Keep the statues’ says the blonde balloon.
Apart from Amritsar, the Mau Mau, the Irish Famine, the Slave Trade, Concentration Camps, Partition and Famine in India WHAT HAVE THE BRITISH EVER DONE FOR US?
Union Jack painted upside-down on BJ’s new plane
How do I know which way the flag’s supposed to go? I’m from Rochdale!
Man Turns Into Chlorinated Superhero
I can clean anything, I’m Super Chlorinated Chicken Man
Eton, Oxford and The Royal Family outlawed as White Supremacist Groups
Elite organisations that hold the power, the money and all the influence. What could be wrong with that?
Political transfer market is open for business
No other country has come in with a bid for Boris, even America would rather stick with Donald
Where’s Wally sponsor Boris’s world-beating Track and Trace Programme
The 3 book training programme; Wally goes to Barnard Castle, Wally goes to Specsavers and Wally’s in the Rose Garden.