Of course more poor people will die, that is because the American God doesn’t like poor people.
Markets rally as Donald leads an anti-Corona Virus prayer meeting
The Psychotic Gunman of The Year Award goes to …
And the award for the ’employee thought most likely to machine gun a roomful of colleagues’ is…
Corona Virus outbreak means we can all stop hugging each other
Millions of Brits are secretly relieved that the outbreak of the Corona Virus means they can stop hugging people they barely know. For the last twenty years the British people have been […]
Satan announces delight at impending fatherhood
Satan announces impending fatherhood, “Being able to pass on the family business will leave more time to work on my golf handicap” he says.
Hipster traumatised after buying coffee from a chain
Millennial Hipster, Skye Nation was left traumatised after buying coffee from a coffee chain.
If we’re called something else no one will know we did it, says Bank
It was a different time, we are not like that anymore, for God’s sake stop going on about us stealing your money and let us get on with doing it again.
Johnson to defeat storms by fitting the UK with double glazing
“It’s another BoJo special, millions spent and nothing ever built.” says Heath Robinson, Builder.
Gloop launches new Vampire Repellent spray
Have you seen a vampire? No, well that’s proof that it works!
Met Office to reboot Stonehenge in IT upgrade
The Stonehenge will give real-time data. If it’s wet, there’s rain about, shady it’ll be sunny and if a top stone is on the ground there’ll be a bit of a blow
Britain is to be turned into a waterpark!
Boris Island Waterpark will offer slides, lazy rivers and an array of watersports.
The Police launch hunt for 20,000 missing Bobbies
“You’d think 20,000 men in pointy hats would be easy to find, but no, not a sign of them” says Chief Constable
Jeremy Clarkson comes out as a Caravaneer
It’s been classic over-compensation. I’ve always loved them but I could never admit but now, in the 21st Century I can say, I am a Caravaneer!
The Chatty Chimp 